3. Letting Go
The opposite of not letting go is clinging. It is clinging to a result, clinging to something being in a certain way, or clinging to someone being or behaving in a desired manner.
Clinging results in a fixated perspective and mindset, an unnecessary and painful attachment, and a forceful and controlling approach.
The attitude of not letting go and clinging is reflected in voice development through two ways.
1. Most of my clients were trying hard to force the result.
Most people think that in order to achieve something, you’ll have to work hard. That is not the case when working on your voice. The best voice comes with the least effort. It is not a process of forcing it to happen. Instead, it is a process of allowing. See Allowing in (I).
The harder you try, the father you’ll get from the result. Let go of the fixated mindset that you’ll only get it by working hard. Contrary to the common misconception, it is to relax and let go of the tension you’ve created while trying hard. When this happens, you’ll be more likely to get the result of a full voice.
2. Almost all my clients held their breath while speaking.
It is shockingly common that 2 in every 3 clients of mine held their breath while speaking.
Fear of being judged, fear of speaking up, or inferiority are the major causes for most of my clients. Don’t think it’s only for the juniors in ranks in the workplace. I’ve coached clients who hold very high positions in their companies and they, too, shared the same problem.
When you hold your breath while speaking, not only your voice will sound weak, unclear and monotonous, but also your image and impression will be greatly discounted. People unconsciously don’t feel that you are confident or convincing.
The easiest yet most difficult way to letting go is to let go of the breath when you speak. When we speak, we are supposed to use the breath. If you do not use the breath, you are holding back not only your voice, but also yourself, the magnificent you.
The three attitudes we’ve talked about, allowing, non-striving and letting go, are three basic principles in voice development. When you work on your voice with them in mind, not only will you develop a full voice, but also cultivate mindfulness.
The entire process requires awareness. As Thich Nhat Hanh, Vietnamese Buddhist Philosopher, pointed out, “Awareness is like the sun. When it shines on things, they are transformed.”
